There is much written on falling in love, but very little about falling out of love.
Indeed, it is simply assumed that when someone falls out of love, even after years of marriage, it is easy to know that this has happened. But is it really that easy?
The answer is that it really isn’t always that easy because there are attitudes that may be confused with falling out of love, which are actually consistent with still being in love.
One such attitude is that of anger or resentment.
In many cases a couple may go through a period (even many years) of constant conflict and express the deepest distain for one another. In such cases it is easy enough to conclude, “We have fallen out of love” or “We no longer love each other.” But notice that there is a difference between resenting and even hating the other, on the one hand, and not loving him or her, on the other hand. So, Henrietta may claim to despise Horatio for being so hard to live with; and she may feel like “strangling him,” even though she may still love him. Well, how could that be? How could you hate someone so much, yet still love him?
The answer lies in the concept of anger itself.
When you are angry at (hate or resent) another, you are disposed to strongly negatively rating the other, or something the other has done, or tends to do. For example, Mary may think John is a horrible person; or that his not showing “any” attention to her is the most despicable thing anyone could possibly do to her.
One such attitude is that of anger or resentment.
In many cases a couple may go through a period (even many years) of constant conflict and express the deepest distain for one another. In such cases it is easy enough to conclude, “We have fallen out of love” or “We no longer love each other.” But notice that there is a difference between resenting and even hating the other, on the one hand, and not loving him or her, on the other hand. So, Henrietta may claim to despise Horatio for being so hard to live with; and she may feel like “strangling him,” even though she may still love him. Well, how could that be? How could you hate someone so much, yet still love him?
The answer lies in the concept of anger itself.
When you are angry at (hate or resent) another, you are disposed to strongly negatively rating the other, or something the other has done, or tends to do. For example, Mary may think John is a horrible person; or that his not showing “any” attention to her is the most despicable thing anyone could possibly do to her.
In such cases of angrily disposed couples, this negative evaluation or rating is typically a result of something the other persistently does, such as not being affectionate, working long hours, or not keeping promises. Here, there is an underlying desire that the partner be different.
read now...TOP 10; THINGS WOMEN WANT TO MAN
read now...TOP 10; THINGS WOMEN WANT TO MAN
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